Dinner on the Grounds is a hallowed tradition in North Carolina, especially Eastern North Carolina. For you non native North Carolinians let me define DOTG. DOTG is an event at a church where everybody brings something they have cooked to eat on one particular Sunday. Generally the event occurs right after Sunday morning services outside on the grounds of the church and sometimes it can be rolled into Homecoming at the church. Now I have yet to have found anything about DOTG in the Bible, but it has got to be there somewhere.
As they say in my neck of the woods, "my mama did not raise no fool", and being properly raised I have NEVER turned down an invitation to any church where I have not tried at least one DOTG . I might miss one here but I have partaken of DOTG in Richlands, Jacksonville, Holly Ridge, Kenansville, Bear Marsh, Mount Olive, Clinton, Lumberton, Fayetteville, Kinston, Smithfield, and one little church in Parkersburg that makes my mouth water right now just thinking about it. Folks there is no better eating than DOTG. There is also no food planning needed.
DOTG means you get the very best of each mama's cooking, after all these ladies want to bring their best dish and want appreciation for their work. You are there to provide such appreciation. So do not avoid any dish that you might like. For example I love butter beans and at a DOTG you can find as many as 5 different styles of cooking this vegetable and every single one is some kinda good. Ditto for corn, green beans, potatoes, and you name it. You will find every kind of beef and pork dish imaginable too. Casseroles of the like you have never seen.
Now proper etiquette is important if you are to attend a DOTG. Come the spring when many of these occur, it is ok to drop hints in your workplace or anywhere churchgoers might be that you really enjoy DOTG and that should do it to get you asked to one of these babies. Never turn down an invite to DOTG from a church you have never been too. Not only is this considered bad manners in North Carolina, it is dumb. Next if you are single this is your chance to ask a girl or guy you have had the hankering to ask out and just knew they would say no. Trust me on this one if they turn you down for DOTG they are not worth going out with period. Most times the answer will be yes since they know what is coming in the food area. Next ALWAYS go to the preaching before DOTG, that right there will set you apart from being someone with manners and someone who has none. Then once preaching is over head politely to the food area making sure you are never first in line, but pretty near the front so as to get the best choices. Being first is bad manners. Finally dig it not being afraid to get all you want and have no fear of piling two foods on top of each other. One real advantage of DOTG eating is everyone EXPECTS you to eat your fill and more. You will not only be picking up food you will also be picking up pounds. Going back for seconds is also ok and frankly is considered good manners here. Be sure to try several different varieties of the same food as I mentioned earlier. I believe it says in the Bible that God forgives those who overindulge at church DOTG.
One other note, if they have soft drinks and such DO NOT use these for your beverage that right off tell others who are looking at you for further invites that you might be a yankee. Drink the tea, it will be sweet, but do not ask if it is sweet since that too will give it away you are a yankee. Tea is made just for that purpose to find out who the yankees are and they are not invited back next year.
Next is the dessert table and proper manners is most important here. First off you "keep your fork", throwing your fork away means you do not show proper concern for the finances of the church. If they have those small plates for dessert get one, if not just use the plate you used for eating the first course since all this stuff ends up in the same place anyway. Again it is ok to pile cake on top of pie and come back for more. In fact at the dessert table you are required to eat more than one kind and frankly praise to your hearts desire here since the ladies who made the desserts hang around this table taking in the compliments. This is important because if you eat enough different desserts and praise enough chances are real good some nice lady will send some dessert home with you. Not only is this considered very high manners it make some mama really happy.
Now here again is the most important manners at DOTG and will get you invited back every time. One, always complement the preaching to several people including the preacher. Two, complement as many mama's and ladies as you can find about such and such food being the best ever. As I said these ladies work hard at their best dish and they are aching for compliments so pile them on. Finally, eat all you want, that is expected and considered good manners as the ladies who cooked this food look upon this as an exclamation point on your compliments.
My best memories of DOTG is at my old home church in Richlands NC where we literally closed the street by the church in town so all the food could be spread out on tables and bring lots of chairs out from the church to sit on while eating. I remember watching ladies in top Sunday dress batting away flies from the food as they laid out the table. I remember searching for my mama's pound cake and hoping others pass it by so we could take more of it home. I remember what always seemed to be a beautiful sunny day each DOTG day. But mostly I remember the fine food that can not be topped by anything cooked today in a restaurant and the fine fellowship with people with which I grew up. I expect if you are 40 or older and from North Carolina you have such memories yourself. If so consider yourself blessed to have participated in this North Carolina tradition.
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